Artyom's poor poor Dorogoy! His poor hoverbike! Why does this accursed swamp hate Artyom?? Alpha's team scouting party decide to fly through "Laying Lines" of demon gypsy magics, which kick Artyom off him bike! Then no sooner does bike get found but stealthy silent island with mouth attempt to make borscht out of Artyom and bike together! Artyom was sneaking so well too... but moon was in cahoots with evil swamp and conspire to hurt all loved ones. At least Artyom save him Dorogoy and feed angry island delicious plasma harpoon down throat. Much less nutritious than drunk Russian and bike! Alpha's Team has... interesting way of doing things. Scouting team found big camp of cannibals just like the one French-man brought back. Artyom watch whole team set up elaborate plan with disguised cyborg and fake prisoner, then from distance Artyom just watch cyborg kick head off of cannibal leader! Truly amazing servo-motors... Artyom must get closer look at these bionics. Artyom will end this journal entry now, as it is not particularly appropriate time to recording "for postaritry". Currently Alpha's Team is run away from Giant Tree Monsters (evil demons driven by moon-rage and bloodlust!) and even worse, Artyom keep thinking he hear strange clicking sound in the bushes... Where is vodka? Артем Евгений Чебышева | Artyom was all like "Nnnnnnnyyyyyyyeetttttt!" |
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Artyom drank less this week. Here Artyom thought Alpha's team was meaning lots of shooting at lizard monster dinosaurs and looking in broken engines for evil gypsy curses. Artyom figure, hey, why not try and keep level head? This "make cents" (Artyom not fully understand this capitalist idiom) especially when moon is in devious waxing gibbous phase of evil lunar cycle. At first, less vodka seemed like good idea! Stash of good clean Russian водка is nearly empty from boredom times before, and angry explosives man make vodka that taste like shoe. And not fine handcrafted leather shoe from mother Russia, no. Like moldy old shoe from shoddy region of Ukraine! So Artyom drink less this week. Less-drunk-Artyom even has been learning American language in spare time. Just other day, Alpha's team taught Artyom difference between "racist" and "racer"! Yet many things strange happen to Alpha's team since Artyom join. Now he beginning to understand why convoy is always held up. Artyom was just relaxing, trying to get closer look at "mini-cyborg" (him have fake skin like rubber) while also keeping eye on sleepy creepy children, when Alpha's team get alerted to strange man down at digging area. When Artyom arrive to backup, he discover that man was not man at all but alien looking like man with pointy ears! He claim to be Russian but Artyom does not understand this Russian-Alien.. He seem to communicate with demon wind spirit, but only really tell spirit to push around logs and make necklace-tie float in air. In warcamps of mother Russia he would have been flayed for demon-talking, but here in capitalist America he recieve job on Alpha's team as well! "Land of Opportunity" was old name for American Empire but this just seem like opportunity for Artyom to get killed by crazy man. However, Artyom was VERY pleased to discover Komrade Russian-Alien has hatred for moon almost equal to Artyom's hatred! Him hate moon for strange reasons, claiming that moon is actually place full of evil peoples. But this does not concern Artyom; the enemy of Artyom's enemy is Artyom's cautious ally.
Still, Artyom does not know if these are good signs or bad. America swamp is place full of demons and evil. Alpha's team seem to be full of curses, probably due to moon's anger. And Artyom not sure if he can trust sorcerer giants or Russian-Aliens or terrifying adolescent stroke victims. Even advanced rubber-cyborg seem suspicious... at this point Artyom would not be surprised to meet talking dinosaur!
Боже мой! Better get used to moldy Ukrainian shoe. Where is vodka? Артем Евгений Чебышева Черт. How long has it been? This whole trip seems like haze to Artyom. Salvage expedition is good paying job, but this heat! Swamp region of America is very different from anything Artyom has ever seen. So many insects, humid air make components malfunction, giant walking lizard monsters all around! But worst of all is slow progress of convoy and large quantity of boredom. Artyom does not know why, but convoy is constantly stopping for days at a time! Peoples disappear one day, then chief medical officer, he die or something, and they vote crazy demon-skin-man for replace him (what is "vote"? Artyom does not know what this American word means). Then somebody blow up one engine on lead convoy craft, two guys get nosebleed - probably from full moon - and demon-man lock everybody inside! Artyom had to drink most of personal vodka stash that night. Lucky there is angry man who make his own vodka in between making bombs for expedition; that was very valuable "friend" choice for Artyom.
In all honest, Artyom not really remember joining this expedition. One minute there is vodka in glass in dirty bar in Chi-Town, next minute there is Artyom's signature on contract! He does not even remember meeting this "Bosef Stok". And now they make Artyom work with enormous man, man who speak American funny, giant cyborg with wolf, and two sleepy childrens! This is very different salvage operation than prowling deadzones for artifacts back in Russia. At least cyborg with wolf is hot, and there might be chance to closer inspect this "small borg". Also expedition is sponsored by large American weapon company, so there is much ordnance at the disposal, and perhaps Artyom can find replacement parts for secondhand cybernetic components he currently have installed.
This is all for log entry right now, Artyom must use translator on requisition paperwork for "moon-seeking-missile." Where is vodka? Артем Евгений Чебышева |
Artyom Yevgeny Chebyshev
Artyom makes interface with journal for provide great entertainment! Now where is vodka? ArchivesCategories |